Telling someone what happened is the hardest step. These scripts give you the exact words. Copy them, edit them, or just use them as a starting point. You do not have to do this alone.
Before you read these: You do not owe anyone every detail. You get to decide how much to share and when. These scripts give you a starting point — use them word for word, change them, or just read them to remind yourself that this is a conversation you can have. The people who care about you want to help.
Telling a parent or guardian
This is the one most people dread the most — and it's also the one that helps the most. Parents may react with shock or fear at first, but almost every parent's first instinct is to protect their child. Give them a moment to process.
Opening script
Ready to use
"Mom/Dad, I need to talk to you about something serious. Something happened online and I need your help. Someone is threatening me and I'm scared. I know this might be hard to hear, but I need you right now. Can we sit down and talk?"
If you're afraid they'll be angry
Ready to use
"I need to tell you something and I'm really nervous because I'm worried you'll be upset. But I'd rather tell you and get help than try to handle this alone. Someone online is threatening me. I made a mistake, but what they're doing to me is a crime, and I need help making it stop."
If you can't say it face to face
Text / note version
"I need to tell you something I can't say out loud right now. Someone online got private images of me and is threatening to share them unless I pay. I'm really scared and ashamed but I know I need help. Can we talk about this when you're ready? I'm safe right now."
Tip for parents reading this: If your child comes to you with this, the single most important thing you can say is: "I'm glad you told me. We're going to figure this out together." Anything that sounds like blame — even unintentionally — will make them shut down. The lecture can wait. Safety comes first.
Telling a friend
Friends can be your lifeline right now. You don't have to share every detail — just enough to let someone know what you're dealing with and that you could use support.
Close friend — full context
Ready to use
"Hey, I need to tell you something that's been eating me alive. Someone online is threatening to share private images of me unless I pay them. I know it sounds wild but it's actually a huge scam that happens to thousands of people. I'm freaking out and I could really use someone in my corner right now."
Keeping it vague but honest
Ready to use
"I've been dealing with something really stressful — someone online is harassing and threatening me. I don't want to get into all the details right now, but I wanted you to know in case I seem off. I'm working on handling it but it's been rough."
Asking for specific help
Ready to use
"Can I ask you something? If someone you don't know contacts you and tries to send you something about me, please don't open it and let me know immediately. I'm dealing with an online scammer who's trying to mess with my life. It's being handled but I wanted to give you a heads up."
Telling a teacher or school counselor
School counselors are trained for exactly this. They've heard it before, they won't judge you, and they know the steps to help. Teachers you trust can connect you to the right people fast.
School counselor
Ready to use
"I need to talk to you about something confidential. I'm being threatened online — someone is trying to extort me with private images. I don't really know what to do and I need help figuring out my next steps. Can you help me?"
Trusted teacher
Ready to use
"Can I talk to you privately? Something is happening online that's really affecting me and I need an adult I trust to help me figure out what to do. It involves someone threatening me and I'm not sure who to go to."
Note: School counselors may be mandatory reporters for certain situations, especially if you're under 18. This is a good thing — it means trained professionals will get involved to help protect you. They're on your side.
Telling a partner or spouse
This conversation carries extra weight because of the trust in your relationship. But keeping it secret gives the extortionist power over you. Being honest — even when it's terrifying — takes that power away.
If the images are from before your relationship
Ready to use
"I need to tell you something difficult and I need you to hear me out. Before we were together, someone obtained private images of me. They're now threatening to share them unless I pay. I'm telling you because I don't want this person to have power over me or over us. I need your support right now."
If it happened during your relationship
Ready to use
"I need to be honest with you about something and I know it's going to be hard to hear. I made a mistake online and someone is now using it to threaten me. I'm ashamed and scared, but I'd rather be honest with you than let a criminal control my life. I'm taking steps to handle it and I need you to know what's happening."
If an ex is the one threatening you
Ready to use
"I need to tell you that my ex is threatening to share intimate images of me. This is illegal — it's called revenge porn and it's a crime in most states. I'm going to report it to the police, but I wanted you to hear it from me first. I need your support, not judgment."
Telling a therapist or doctor
Mental health professionals are bound by confidentiality. They've heard every version of this. You can be completely honest.
Ready to use
"I'm being extorted online — someone has intimate images of me and is threatening to share them. It's consuming my life right now. I'm having trouble sleeping, I feel constant anxiety, and I need help processing what's happening to me."
Telling an employer (if needed)
You may not need to tell your employer at all. But if you're worried the extortionist might contact your workplace, getting ahead of it puts you in control of the narrative.
To HR or a trusted manager
Ready to use
"I want to make you aware of a situation. I'm the victim of an online extortion scheme. There's a possibility the individual may try to contact the company to cause me harm. I've reported it to law enforcement and I'm handling it, but I wanted to get ahead of it in case anything comes through. I'd appreciate your discretion."
Important: You are the victim of a crime. No legitimate employer will fire someone for being the target of extortion. If you're worried about retaliation, speak to HR with a written record. Most companies have policies protecting employees who are crime victims.